1. #1
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    Jan 2002
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    49
    Trembling and falling,
    feel my body shakin'
    Like a voice from the far distance calling
    feelin' my covers brakin'

    The voice's getting louder more intense
    vibrating my mind my soul my inner emotions
    being unconcoius from offense to defense
    runs me down and out into devotions

    Getting the blast from the depth of my soul
    braking the walls surrounding my heart
    feel getting free reaching my goal
    left the bad things behind me see the good ones to start......


    Jah bless

    ISOHOE

    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  2. #2
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    Oct 2001
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    1.201
    *wow* wonderful.....it is really good written.....has a harmonic melody while reading.......would you mind if i would copy your poem in my book?
    greetings sternentraum
    Stir of time, the sequence
    returning upon itself, branching a new way. To suffer pain, hope.
    The attention
    lives in it as a poem lives or a song
    going under the skin of memory.

    "Heavy" by Denise Levertov

  3. #3
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    Jan 2002
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    Hi Sternentraum,

    thanx for your critics.
    I don't mind you copying it into your book. Just take care of it as it is a part of more...........

    Jah bless

    ISOHOE





    [Geändert durch ISOHOE am 13-02-2002 um 12:57]
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  4. #4
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    Jan 2002
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    Hi Sternentraum,

    I like your Nickname "Sternentraum", actually got something that I think is matching. Here it is:

    Take a look at the stars' shining light,
    twinkling, blinking, shining bright,
    what you're seeing now is something from a long time ago,
    as the lights' journey takes time, is moving slow

    Jah bless

    ISOHOE
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  5. #5
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    Oct 2001
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    1.201
    hey, that's nice....thank you.....and it matches very well to my nickname....i like it very much....thanks again
    Stir of time, the sequence
    returning upon itself, branching a new way. To suffer pain, hope.
    The attention
    lives in it as a poem lives or a song
    going under the skin of memory.

    "Heavy" by Denise Levertov

  6. #6
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    Jan 2002
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    49
    ......... my pleasure.
    But by the way I have seen that you have quite some nice poems as well here in that forum.

    Did you ever put one in english? Not that I do not appreciate the german language but (for the moment) I am more influenced by english vibes and therefore I am thinking in english.

    Well, yes and writing poems is just writing down thoughts.

    Would love to hear.......



    Jah bless

    ISOHOE
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  7. #7
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    Oct 2001
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    1.201
    hm...let me think, ...yes, i put a poem in that forum a while ago....it was written in english although the title is german...it is called "gedanken fliessen bei musik"....i guess you have to look at the earlier pages of this group....i've written a haiku in englisch as well.....also a little while ago....but it has no special title....
    Stir of time, the sequence
    returning upon itself, branching a new way. To suffer pain, hope.
    The attention
    lives in it as a poem lives or a song
    going under the skin of memory.

    "Heavy" by Denise Levertov

  8. #8
    Registriert seit
    Jan 2002
    Beiträge
    49
    Yep, took some time but I've found it.
    You are writing very nice, got a good way of puttin' harmony into your words.

    For the haiku you just should change the last one into ... waiting for a new spring.

    Think that sounds better and more english (Hope you don't hate me for that correction).

    Seems like that its quite a time ago you've been into english poems, what's the reason for that. And I hope by now you are over of what you describe in your poem.....

    Jah bless

    Isohoe
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  9. #9
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    Oct 2001
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    1.201
    thanks for the compliment.....as for the haiku....i welcome critics for my writings....but in this case it would change the meaning a bit....but i will think over it, thanks for the hint....

    hm..as for not writing english poems for some time....i had no ideas.....or no inspiration if you want to call it this way.....its hard to explain.....but if i get the idea in my mind in english i write the poem....same way as in german.......and this is only from time to time.....most of it when i am listening to music...but i hope i will get some ideas for english poems again....

    and yes, i am over it ....for some time now....but this feelings give the best poems
    Stir of time, the sequence
    returning upon itself, branching a new way. To suffer pain, hope.
    The attention
    lives in it as a poem lives or a song
    going under the skin of memory.

    "Heavy" by Denise Levertov

  10. #10
    Registriert seit
    Jan 2002
    Beiträge
    49
    just for the haiku:

    If your meaning is into waking then you should change it into "Waking up the spring"

    Just got over it because waking of is a sort of, mmh let's say something not existend. Hope you understand what I mean.

    Anyway, yes I completly understand what you mean. As I've said before I am currently inspired by english vibes that makes my brain switsched into this language. Therefore my thoughts and dreams and my poems are in english.

    I have times were I do the same in german only and sometimes even spanish. The latter is not as much as my inspirations and I know the knowledge of this language is not as far.

    And finaly yes, it's true, this kind of emotions turns into quite powerful motors in writing poems.

    For myself I more like the positive emotions in that respect.

    I've found something again I've written on a positive emotional vibe which is:

    It's the emotions, the ones you given me
    This feelings that set my mind up free.
    It's your Love, a present supplied
    that makes my mind go wild.

    Vibes coming like waves with equality
    a sound so naturally
    opening the gate to my brain
    makes me feel like never the same.

    It's a feeling apart from the touchable
    emotions unthinkable
    takes you high into the sky far from above
    keeps me drowning in that sea of love

    Jah bless

    ISOHOE
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

  11. #11
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    Oct 2001
    Beiträge
    1.201
    hm...ok, if the word does not exist or the meaning, i have to change it...thanks again for the hint...but i know what you mean....

    as for the positiv emotions....they are as well to write poems as the negatives....it depends on which emotions are important or avaliable at the moment....and yours on positiv emotions is good....

    as for the language....i also know french and spanish but i do not dare to try to write a poem.....my knowledge is far to casual for this kind of use.....but maybe one day....

    greetings sternentraum
    Stir of time, the sequence
    returning upon itself, branching a new way. To suffer pain, hope.
    The attention
    lives in it as a poem lives or a song
    going under the skin of memory.

    "Heavy" by Denise Levertov

  12. #12
    Registriert seit
    Jan 2002
    Beiträge
    49
    Thanx for your critics, I very much appreciate it.

    The good on writing poems on a positive vibe is to get yourself clear with:

    Love - What's the meaning of that?

    Writing poems brings you into thinking in details of things (Love) and that makes it easier to understand it.
    And by changing words, slightly to adapt your poems you see how easily it can change in respect of meaning and sense,
    interesting.

    And I have the experience that you, by doing so, can seperate real, deep emotions for the one you thinking of and, so to say, a warm spring inside yourself, just, and no more.

    Jah bless

    ISOHOE
    In Search Of Heaven On Earth

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